may birthday

 ..

~ remembering her littleness ~



She had a special before birthday campout, just her and her daddy.
She lost a tooth on her last day of being 8.
And she lost a tooth on her first day of being 9.
I listened to her play that morning.
That hushed, absorbed play, soft little voice talking to herself, her little dolls.
Just like a child of much younger years.
More of a song really.
Always she has been my little sing-song girl.


And another campout for her birthday.
First birthday at the land!
We travelled with cake.
Cake with strawberries, raspberries, blueberries, lemon glaze, and whipped cream.
But we forgot the raspberries and blueberries.
We forgot the birthday candles.
But wishes by the campfire are special too.
(And an extra piece of cake the next day at the house with extra berries and candle on top.)


We took hardly any pictures. And they are mostly blurry.
We never made it to our early morning lake picnic.
Her sister got a headache (migraine?) the next day at the land. She even threw up.
We had to head back to the house earlier than we had planned.
But still there was time for a birthday girl horse ride (lead) on Sage.

She received some carefully chosen books, little wooden trucks, a little dish set, a diary, and a dress.

Her big sister got her first diary when she turned 9, so she thought she might get hers this year too. And if she did get it she was of course going to write in it right away. Which she did. (She has amazing phonetic spelling abilities.)

Handmade by big sister gifts of a doll apron and a little knitted cat. And a promise to teach her how to knit her own kittens. This gift was so loved, she sat speechless for several moments.

She has such a deep tenderness in her. So sweet. So quiet.
Sometimes so loud!
Fragile and tough.
Timid and courageous.

Oh, and the dress. Little blue dress. Blueberry dress. Every last bit of blue dress.
I really love the dress.
(So very soon we shall have to talk about the dress...)

And I love her feet. The way she curls her toes. Her way of skipping about when she is just happy as can be.

Our dear sweet bursting with love 9 year old child! We love her so!!!


...

visiting the flowers...

..

I mentioned last time that we had a visit with our old friend/neighbor/neighborhood. And the flowers. The girls always look forward to visiting our friend and her flowers.



~ I cannot help but notice that one child is dressed for a chilly spring morning and the other is wearing a sundress. A sundress that I made for her when she was maybe 3 or 4. She is wishing it would fit her forever...

I also notice she has no socks on.

Which reminds me of a conversation on the way to the land the other day...

"Chessa, did you remember socks?
"Yep. One's clean and the other one's dirty, but they match, and they're both wool."
"Oh." ("Ha ha ha!") "Good."



Behind that wooden fence is where the house that Chloe was born in used to be.

(Burned down in a huge area forest fire, I think it was about 11 years ago, we had just moved out of the house 2 months before. Several other houses on the road burned down, our dear neighbor was fortunately spared...)

Behind the more open part of the fence, where the girls are looking back towards, is where we had our garden.

I see the little dirt road where I walked so often with little baby Chloe.


And now I hear little baby Elsa waking in bed.

Last night I had a slumber party with my eldest and youngest.
The youngest just slept. Eldest and I had a sewing night.

Sweet middle child and her daddy had a special campout at the land.

Cause sweet middle child has only a couple more days of being 8 years old.

Oh my!

Better get finished with the morning chores so I can get back to birthday dress sewing!


...

gratitude for motherhood, and old photographs...

..

~Nearly 13 years ago, the first days of her life, my first days as a mother.

~A few weeks before she was born. We had just moved into a little A-frame in the forest. 
(We are not nearly as young as you might be thinking we look...) (25 and 27...)

~ See, my yellow-y gold flowery vintage-y sheet! I said before that it is always out at homebirth time...

~And today... (No one was sure if the camera was working...)
(Nursing baby...)

~ Visiting an old friend/neighbor, right next door to where our first child was born...)

Seriously absolutely definitely the best thing that ever happened to me. Becoming a mother. It was like I instantly felt completely me. Life was just exactly as it was supposed to be. And now I am the mother of three girls. Three girls!!! (Kinda makes me wonder how I could have thought this baby was going to be a boy. Because three girls, it was something I always seemed to know. I'm not saying only three girls, but yes, definitely, three girls.)

I think this work of creating families and raising children is oh so very important. I am so incredibly grateful to be a mother to these children. And I am honored to share friendship with so many wonderful mothers. 

Wishing you all a happy mothering heart full of peace. 

With love, Renee

...

first days in May

..

Wandering in the forest on the first morning of May.

We had spent our first night on our land. Our first campfire.

Visiting firs. The little buds of their cones are the most wonderful pink colors.

Climbing trees. Climbing trees very high up! And very very windy!
She held on tight. She said it was scary. She had the biggest smile on her face. You see! I watched some of the time.

Morning fire. Ash cakes for breakfast. Fingers messy and floury from the dough. Chessa is running off to play and Chloe says, "Rub your hands in the dirt first, so they're clean, so you don't get your little trucks dirty."
Hmm? Kinda makes sense....


~~~


This past weekend...

Our first visitors out to our land. A little May Faire we had planned long ago. The girls and I made colorful tissue paper flowers to decorate some of our favorite trees, but we never hung them since it seemed like rain was on the way. The balancing (across logs) contest was a great fun success though. More forest wandering. These friends of ours really know how to appreciate trees. Another campfire. Late picnic lunch, which turned out to be dinner. Quinoa salad with edible flowers sprinkled all over the top. Pretty and yummy.

~~~

Yesterday...

Woke up to rain. A good day for knitting and pancakes. (And vacuuming and cleaning toilets, I guess.) The sky didn't brighten until early evening, which made the whole day feel a little confusing.

Early to bed with a baby who was feeling a little sad about growing teeth and a fussy belly. So good and cuddly in bed with my warm little baby, big sisters gathered in too, Tiptoes Lightly for bedtime story.

~~~

Today...

Maybe more rain. Thinking about seeds in the ground. Hopefully some knitting. It will probably be mostly a kitchen day though. (Aren't they all?) I'm off to bake bread now...

Happy day to you!

...

~ moments ~

..

I laughed and called out to her... she was so much reminding me of Anne of Green Gables headed off to the train station...



Joining Amanda Soule and my dear friend Jules to share some special moments.


Oh, also, there is something really really really special that I haven't mentioned here yet. It is about a special place, (and all the pictures (outdoors) I have been sharing lately are from there) and it is ours...
(I feel like there is so much to say, many stories that come before this one, but there hasn't been time for the other stories yet, and now this one begins...)


Wishing you all beautiful weekend with many happy moments!


...