may birthday

 ..

~ remembering her littleness ~



She had a special before birthday campout, just her and her daddy.
She lost a tooth on her last day of being 8.
And she lost a tooth on her first day of being 9.
I listened to her play that morning.
That hushed, absorbed play, soft little voice talking to herself, her little dolls.
Just like a child of much younger years.
More of a song really.
Always she has been my little sing-song girl.


And another campout for her birthday.
First birthday at the land!
We travelled with cake.
Cake with strawberries, raspberries, blueberries, lemon glaze, and whipped cream.
But we forgot the raspberries and blueberries.
We forgot the birthday candles.
But wishes by the campfire are special too.
(And an extra piece of cake the next day at the house with extra berries and candle on top.)


We took hardly any pictures. And they are mostly blurry.
We never made it to our early morning lake picnic.
Her sister got a headache (migraine?) the next day at the land. She even threw up.
We had to head back to the house earlier than we had planned.
But still there was time for a birthday girl horse ride (lead) on Sage.

She received some carefully chosen books, little wooden trucks, a little dish set, a diary, and a dress.

Her big sister got her first diary when she turned 9, so she thought she might get hers this year too. And if she did get it she was of course going to write in it right away. Which she did. (She has amazing phonetic spelling abilities.)

Handmade by big sister gifts of a doll apron and a little knitted cat. And a promise to teach her how to knit her own kittens. This gift was so loved, she sat speechless for several moments.

She has such a deep tenderness in her. So sweet. So quiet.
Sometimes so loud!
Fragile and tough.
Timid and courageous.

Oh, and the dress. Little blue dress. Blueberry dress. Every last bit of blue dress.
I really love the dress.
(So very soon we shall have to talk about the dress...)

And I love her feet. The way she curls her toes. Her way of skipping about when she is just happy as can be.

Our dear sweet bursting with love 9 year old child! We love her so!!!


...

visiting the flowers...

..

I mentioned last time that we had a visit with our old friend/neighbor/neighborhood. And the flowers. The girls always look forward to visiting our friend and her flowers.



~ I cannot help but notice that one child is dressed for a chilly spring morning and the other is wearing a sundress. A sundress that I made for her when she was maybe 3 or 4. She is wishing it would fit her forever...

I also notice she has no socks on.

Which reminds me of a conversation on the way to the land the other day...

"Chessa, did you remember socks?
"Yep. One's clean and the other one's dirty, but they match, and they're both wool."
"Oh." ("Ha ha ha!") "Good."



Behind that wooden fence is where the house that Chloe was born in used to be.

(Burned down in a huge area forest fire, I think it was about 11 years ago, we had just moved out of the house 2 months before. Several other houses on the road burned down, our dear neighbor was fortunately spared...)

Behind the more open part of the fence, where the girls are looking back towards, is where we had our garden.

I see the little dirt road where I walked so often with little baby Chloe.


And now I hear little baby Elsa waking in bed.

Last night I had a slumber party with my eldest and youngest.
The youngest just slept. Eldest and I had a sewing night.

Sweet middle child and her daddy had a special campout at the land.

Cause sweet middle child has only a couple more days of being 8 years old.

Oh my!

Better get finished with the morning chores so I can get back to birthday dress sewing!


...

gratitude for motherhood, and old photographs...

..

~Nearly 13 years ago, the first days of her life, my first days as a mother.

~A few weeks before she was born. We had just moved into a little A-frame in the forest. 
(We are not nearly as young as you might be thinking we look...) (25 and 27...)

~ See, my yellow-y gold flowery vintage-y sheet! I said before that it is always out at homebirth time...

~And today... (No one was sure if the camera was working...)
(Nursing baby...)

~ Visiting an old friend/neighbor, right next door to where our first child was born...)

Seriously absolutely definitely the best thing that ever happened to me. Becoming a mother. It was like I instantly felt completely me. Life was just exactly as it was supposed to be. And now I am the mother of three girls. Three girls!!! (Kinda makes me wonder how I could have thought this baby was going to be a boy. Because three girls, it was something I always seemed to know. I'm not saying only three girls, but yes, definitely, three girls.)

I think this work of creating families and raising children is oh so very important. I am so incredibly grateful to be a mother to these children. And I am honored to share friendship with so many wonderful mothers. 

Wishing you all a happy mothering heart full of peace. 

With love, Renee

...

first days in May

..

Wandering in the forest on the first morning of May.

We had spent our first night on our land. Our first campfire.

Visiting firs. The little buds of their cones are the most wonderful pink colors.

Climbing trees. Climbing trees very high up! And very very windy!
She held on tight. She said it was scary. She had the biggest smile on her face. You see! I watched some of the time.

Morning fire. Ash cakes for breakfast. Fingers messy and floury from the dough. Chessa is running off to play and Chloe says, "Rub your hands in the dirt first, so they're clean, so you don't get your little trucks dirty."
Hmm? Kinda makes sense....


~~~


This past weekend...

Our first visitors out to our land. A little May Faire we had planned long ago. The girls and I made colorful tissue paper flowers to decorate some of our favorite trees, but we never hung them since it seemed like rain was on the way. The balancing (across logs) contest was a great fun success though. More forest wandering. These friends of ours really know how to appreciate trees. Another campfire. Late picnic lunch, which turned out to be dinner. Quinoa salad with edible flowers sprinkled all over the top. Pretty and yummy.

~~~

Yesterday...

Woke up to rain. A good day for knitting and pancakes. (And vacuuming and cleaning toilets, I guess.) The sky didn't brighten until early evening, which made the whole day feel a little confusing.

Early to bed with a baby who was feeling a little sad about growing teeth and a fussy belly. So good and cuddly in bed with my warm little baby, big sisters gathered in too, Tiptoes Lightly for bedtime story.

~~~

Today...

Maybe more rain. Thinking about seeds in the ground. Hopefully some knitting. It will probably be mostly a kitchen day though. (Aren't they all?) I'm off to bake bread now...

Happy day to you!

...

~ moments ~

..

I laughed and called out to her... she was so much reminding me of Anne of Green Gables headed off to the train station...



Joining Amanda Soule and my dear friend Jules to share some special moments.


Oh, also, there is something really really really special that I haven't mentioned here yet. It is about a special place, (and all the pictures (outdoors) I have been sharing lately are from there) and it is ours...
(I feel like there is so much to say, many stories that come before this one, but there hasn't been time for the other stories yet, and now this one begins...)


Wishing you all beautiful weekend with many happy moments!


...

knitting bonnets and a colorful little quilt

 ..

Yes, little Elsie now has a bonnet that fits, though you see it here still unfinished. Soon too I will cast on for another, I am having some more ideas for the pattern. And because this one fits, but only just barely. The yarn is so pretty, I am loving knitting with it.

This little quilt did not turn out to be quite what I had originally intended, and I think I am happy about that. I guess that's what happens when you start something one year and then finish it a couple (few maybe) years later. It is making a just right play quilt for Elsa though. She likes it very much.  It sure is bright, but that's what I do in the spring, pull out all the most colorful cheerful colors I can find. I decided to just let the quilting lines be not too straight or evenly spaced. Kind of a bad idea, cause I feel like it just looks like I did a messy job. I think next time I am going to have to go for perfectly straight. Yes. On all the lines where I was "stitching in the ditch" it is pretty much perfect though ;)

(Sorry, can't help it. I have tried to let go of some of my perfectionist tendencies, but when it comes to sewing I just cannot...)

Other happy handwork plans include a little teething doll (teething!), and we have birthdays coming up soon! So it's time to be putting more thought into that...

Oh, and the wooden doll. She is new to us and she was recently born in the forest, and she is Swedish (so I am told..) She does not have a name yet, so if you have any suggestions? Also, her head might still get sanded.

And hooray, this week I am finally once again joining Nicole for her Keep Calm Craft On!

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little things, and gratitude

..

This evening, mountain bluebird on a tall dry mullein stalk.

This month.. sunny days, rainy days, snowy days. Yes, I will be grateful for the snowy days too. The forests were misty and grey, all so cozy feeling. It snows here in April, it's just how it is.

My yellow-y gold flowery vintage-y sheet. Not thrifted, it is mine from when I was little. It seems to always find it's way out when we are gathering extra sheets, blankets, towels, etc. for homebirth supplies. Other times it is put away for years. It makes me really happy. Even if it is making my blog look kind of funny cause now half my pics are on this yellow background.

And I love those little toes. And every little sigh, whisper, grunt, and giggle that comes from her. Those sighs. The soft happy nursing baby ones. Oh goodness.

Glad that she finally has a wool bonnet that fits to keep her head warm in the cool forest afternoons.

Forest afternoons.

How golden the pine needles were in the sun. How they crunched under her feet as she ran along. How pink and rosy her cheeks were. How brave she is there. In her forest.

And my eldest. And how she cares for us all.

Oh, and my husband. He is my prince. Our hero.


Friends too.

Chatting and smiling and laughing with Jules until way too late at night. (ha ha, "chatting", is that what it's called?, she is the only person I do that with, and I'm sure we are two of the most untechnological people there are...)

Good emails from good good friends that just happened to come on a day when extra cheer was needed.

And Lisa. I am grateful for her for all kinds of reasons. Including surprise phone calls that always make me smile when I answer. She is really good at these gratitude posts too. I always tell her I'm going to start doing them also. And now I am...


I decided that I wanted to take a little more time to stay in touch with my blog friends, post here, and even maybe read a few other inspiring blogs once in a while. (Those of you who know me more know that I really really really don't like to be at the computer. So by saying spend a little more time doing it, it just means a little more than the not much time at all I spend in general. So I think that could be okay...)

Anyhow, that's how I have ended up visiting Taryn and her sweet family and her neat wooly mossy blog. And she does nice gratitude posts too.

I'm all about niceness and gratitude these days. Well, always I am, of course. We just seem to need extra great doses of it lately, I'll take it wherever I can get it.

Hope you all have lots of nice happy beautiful days this week!


...

yarn along...

 ..

The bonnet is going to be way too big but it should fit her well next winter. So now I am picking up stitches on the hat that she has outgrown, if it is a little longer it should stay on her head just fine.

Here in our mountains a wool hat can be needed year round if you consider chilly summer nights as well. Do any of you have a favorite pattern for baby hats or bonnets? Or booties? She has outgrown all her little knit socks too..

Next up to knit will be another pair of pants like the ones she is often wearing in the photos here. They were a gift, the Elizabeth Zimmerman baby leggings, hopefully I will be able to work out the pattern and knit up a cute pair too. They are very versatile and super cute, I think I will be making them the same size, just lots lots longer. I am going to use this neat seamoss peace fleece yarn we just got from the waldorf co-op.

The other lovely yarns in the picture were gifts as well. Some so so soft grey alpaca from my dear friend Melanie. And some pretty green yarn, a color called Lark, which is appropriate since it came from sweet Ginny. Ginny sent the yarn last year when I was pregnant so I could knit something for baby. But without baby being born, not knowing if it was a boy or girl, I just couldn't commit to any specific project for it. I am still undecided but sure do look forward to knitting something special with it.


I have a few different books around for reading right now. I read Children at Play about 10 years ago and have wanted to re-read it because it is very sweet. We are lucky that one of the kind-of-local libraries has some good Waldorf books...


Elsa likes when we try her bonnet on her, needles and all still attached. But she likes sucking on her hands best...


Happy to join the join the Yarn Along this week!


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